GET YO GAME ON - I know what I know and daz what I know

Have you ever taught a class? If you have, then you will understand my introduction. In every classroom there is at least one person who continuously agrees with you. It goes something like this: Oh yes, uhh ha, yes, yes, nod, nod, yes, nod, etc… Be very sure and never forget that this is definitely the one person who has no clue what you are talking about. Do not be this person. There is nothing more pathetic then a person pretending to understanding everything you are saying and you know that they are a dumb ass. How do I know? Because I have dumbdar; very similar to radar and gaydar. It is a siren that goes off in my head and I just want to reach out and pat the poor little thing on the head. It’s just so sad. But on the brighter side, there is hope.

Game 101 starts by conquering your fears and feeling hope, empowering your speech patterns then putting a little strut in your style. Why me? Why do I think I am so great as to tell someone else how to get game? Because I am, now sit down and shut your mouth. I’m talking.

The hope I am speaking of? Well that would be to get your game on. For without game, you are lame. I believe that was Shakespeare. Some people will tell you that some have game and some don’t. All lies. Do not let people label you. Everything is obtainable. You just can not be scared of ………NO……..It happens and so what. Big deal. Who are you to think you are so great that no one can say no to you. Or you get told no, and then you sulk. Wimp! You know what no means to me? No means I am a step closer to a yes. I almost want to hug the possible donor for telling me no because you have just helped me in getting a little closer to my next yes. If you go your whole life trying to get a yes’ and never do, then end it all. I was wrong and life is not worth living. But that will never happen. So the fear of going in cold is not as bad you may think. I love it. It’s like the first date, you know. I love first dates because I can run the show. It is only after a while do I become the servant but that’s another blog. But you know what I mean.

Having a powerful speech pattern is the most important thing in life; after breathing. God, my friend, gave you the ability to breath. I, your friend, will give you the ability to have game. First, THE BASICS: hedging, intensifiers, and fillers. Huh? What? Hedging? I hate yard work. If this is what you’re thinking, go slap your mother for me.

Hedging is when you make a direct comment and invalidate it with indecisiveness. For example, I would like you to donate 5k to help the starving puppies in Djibouti. (Direct) I would like you to donate 5k to help the starving puppies in Djibouti, unless this is not a good time for you. (Hedging) Unless this is not a good time for you? Are you serious? The direct way makes it harder for the donor to say no. It’s hard for them to say no also. So what you have done in the hedging comment is allow the possible donor and easier way to get out. If he was not going to give me the money anyway, I want to put a little heat his way too. Life is hard people. Don’t give outs when you don’t have to.

Intensifiers are good and powerful words but when used too much, you lose credibility. When someone is talking to you and you retort absolutely, then wonderful, incredible, absolutely, say goodbye to your creditability. This is a common known fact in the courtroom. It’s just not for lawyers anymore. An intensifier every now and then is fine and it gives power to your speech but you had better be careful how many intensifiers you use. FANTASTIC!

Fillers are words that people use when they can’t think of what they are suppose to say. I was going to, uhhhh, uhhh, the store and wanted, uhhh, the stuff on the, you know, ummm, shelf. This screams dumb ass and who in the world is going to give you anything when you sound like the missing link. Say what you have to say and do not sound like a monkey. You know what I hate the worst… Oh, this one kills me. “Yea man, I was driving and got a ticket, you know. I was barely, you know, speeding. That cop was an asshole, you know.” Do I know? Oh, no. You are far superior to I and I can not even begin to understand the words that are spewing out of your cranium. You moron! I’ve burnt more brain cells then you will ever have.

Put some strut in your game. First, basic mommy 101. Put your shoulders back, sit up straight, don’t chew with you mouth open, etc… If you don’t know these or have to work on them, I just don’t know what to tell you. I’m at a loss. Approaching a possible donor is sometimes scary but never let them see it. When you start to look fearful it gets worse for you. You begin to sweat, you stumble, your inside is FREAKING OUT, and you are about to lose it. Just chill in the beginning and never let it get that way. Walk in confident, even if you’re not, shoulders back and eye to eye contact is a must. This is not the 70’s, so formal greetings are out. Do not say, “Good morning, Sir”, to Timmy the 27 year old CFO. But don’t do not greet Timmy with “waz up” either. If you walk in and it is a 92 year old that is still acting CEO of his own company, “good morning Sir,” it will be. You find the greeting that is appropriate for the situation. The first look and the greeting will be imperative.

I must end this here because Michelle said my last blog was too long. Hater!